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Sunday, 16 October 2011

When a Friendship Ends

By: lavender

feature photoThe sad truth in life is that most friendships aren’t meant to last. Whether we like it or not, things change and people change. But how do you prevent yourself from getting out of it completely torn up? How do you walk away in the most dignified manner possible? It’s difficult, and it takes a lot of self-restraint, but it is definitely possible.
Firstly and most importantly, know when it’s time for the friendship to end. The worst thing you can do is drag something out, fight after fight, useless attempt after useless attempt. Know when to give up. Know when to recognize that no matter what you say to your former best friend, they really just don’t care enough to make a change. Realize that this person is completely different now, or perhaps you’re completely different now. The point is, you can’t understand this person anymore, you don’t respect this person anymore. Walk away, because some things just aren’t meant to be.
After you’ve accepted the fact that it’s over, the hardest thing to do is stop yourself from bitching. It’s understandable, you’re hurt and angry. You feel completely betrayed! But stick to venting to just the smallest, closest circle, only to the people who can make you feel better about it but would never broadcast anything you tell them. No matter what your former best friend has done to you or is now doing to you, don’t stoop to her level.
Of course the end of a friendship can get really awkward. How do you behave around that person now that they’re no longer your best friend? My advice would be to behave perfectly politely but just don’t go out of your way for them. Wish them good morning, politely enquire if they had trouble with the latest assignment, hold the door open for them if you must. Just never invite them out for a drink, ask them out for lunch or offer them a ride home. This person is no longer your responsibility, let go and be happy that you’re finally free from the freeloading parasite.
Finally, move on by appreciating the wonderful people you have in your life. The ones who value your friendship and would never take you for granted. Now you have more time and energy make those who truly matter feel special. Why waste time and energy on dying friendships with draining people? Life is too short and some people are just not worth it.

So let go, move on, live your life and be happy.

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